Saturday, March 19, 2016
The Truth Is Out! Ted Cruz Revealed To Be An Alien!
Yes folks, that's right, you heard right. National Buffoon investigative reporters have discovered that the Koch industries hatchet man, Edwardo Raphael Cruz is in fact some sort of alien creature sent to earth to tenderize human brains for consumption by his species. "Human brains are delicious" said Cruz. I particularly enjoy them with some fava beans and some nice Chianti". He went on to say "But only Evangelical brains are really tender and moist, there are very few folds in them." "They form perfect turds!" he proudly proclaimed. Cruz is believed to have come from Uranus and like the bug alien in the movie M.I.B., he is uncomfortable in human skin. National Buffoon reporters managed to photograph Cruz in his true form (the photo above is merely a "costume" he wears to appear more like a human). Below is the clip of Cruz in his true form, eating guests at his $1,000.00 dollar a plate presidential war chest dinner.
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